Many of us are starting to realize that judging ourselves is no longer serving us. We’re realizing that the more we love ourselves, the more we are set free. Moreover, we’re the only ones who can truly uplift ourselves and be the guardians of our own well-being.
Letting go of self-judgement isn’t easy. For most people, we’ve been doing it our whole lives. So judging ourselves has become a deeply entrenched program that our mind runs all the time. For some of us, no matter what we do we can’t seem to be able to please ourselves.
We may judge ourselves about how we look, what we do, how good of a job we’ve done in comparison to other people, so on and so forth. We also judge ourselves based on how we think other people see us, even though this is out of our control!
To love ourselves more and to live in closer alignment with Source, we need to let go of self-judgments. Since these judging thoughts probably come automatically due to deep programming, remember that it will take time and patience. But the following will help you on this journey of letting go:
1. Realize that any label that is dualistic cannot hold truth.
Our judgments are dualistic in nature, because they all have an opposite that gives them meaning through contrast. “I am tall” can only be because others are “short.” But surely there are other people out there who are taller than you, which would make you short. The point is, everything is relative.
A thought comes up in your head telling you you’ve failed. According to what definition of failure? You look in the mirror and a thought tells you that you’re not beautiful. Beautiful compared to whom?
You cannot really judge yourself unless it’s in relation to someone else. And even then, it can’t be absolutely true. Anything dualistic is a perception and it’s impermanent. You could judge yourself to be “successful,” but in doing so you’ve tied yourself to its opposite because “failure” is required to define “success.” You will not be “successful” forever. Even if you are “successful” all throughout this lifetime, what about beyond this lifetime? That which is real is permanent, which can only be the infinite existence of spirit, or consciousness.
2. See that you can only truly be defined by infinite potential.
As you can see, anything dualistic in nature cannot truly define you. You are not your thoughts or emotions, but rather the pure conscious awareness witnessing them. This consciousness is infinite in nature.
When you realize that this infinite womb of potential is your truest identity, you can see that any judgment is just a narrowing down of that infinite potential to one tiny slice of possibility. If you are infinity, you can’t really be defined by anything, except infinity! When negative judgments about yourself come up in your mind, remember that they can’t hold power over you unless you want them too — because you are in truth unlimited.
3. Remember that everything happens for a reason.
Everything is the doing of divine intelligence. Everything unfolds organically and naturally to serve expansion. Therefore, any negative self criticism is unnecessary and false and irrelevant! Even if you do something that you judge yourself for, saying “that wasn’t supposed to happen,” realize that you did this to ultimately serve your expansion.
I have so many examples of this in my own life, and so does anyone who made a mistake and learned from it. If a mistake taught you a lesson that improved your life forever, was it really a “mistake” that wasn’t meant to happen? So be easy on yourself!
This topic has a lot to do with my last article and video about transcending self criticism, so check it out if you haven’t already. To get these articles by email when they come out, use the subscribe box on the right.